Sore and happy...

13,123 steps today....I cannot believe how much I walked! Thats almost 7 miles. 7 miles on my leg. I have to admit it, I am in pain. But I also feel like I accomplished something and now that I have my ice wrap on, its not so bad. The dog enjoyed herself immensely and she even made a new friend. This friend came along right after she lost her beloved ball and tossed her a new one that she had found near the tennis courts. I love it when life works out because beasty was not happy about her lost ball.

Eating has been going well too! I have to pack my lunch for work, and I've been really good about choosing healthy and filling foods. I don't want to undo the work I've been doing so it's getting easier to eat right and drink lots of water.

Now I just need to get enough rest. Tonight, I don't think that will be a problem. I'm exhausted!

Mud Baths and Milk Bones

So today for exercise I decided to walk the dog on the mile loop around the lake. We ended up going around both "lakes" (one is much smaller than the other) and I had a lovely time. The dog however had an amazing time! Apparently she enjoys her exercise already, and doesn't need to force herself to get up and move like her trusty biped (aka me). She even went above and beyond her usual run after the tennis ball, and decided it would be great to add in even more cardio by swimming. By the time we were done with the smaller lake her lovely blonde self was black. Not just dirty but muddy and slimey. It was gross! However, she must know how good mud can be for the skin because she kept going back in. Next it was time to go around the other lake. At this lake she proceeded to perform the cleansing rinse. I'm sure her skin feels divine, and her muscles strong because she continued to run after the tennis ball.

A person could learn something good from this kind of walk. First, find an activity you love. The dog loves chasing tennis balls and could do it all day if you were willing to keep throwing them. Second, don't forget to vary your activities. Swimming is a great addition to any fitness plan and I hope it gets warm enough for me to swim soon...it has been a really cool summer so far. Third, don't neglect your skin. Drinking water is great for the skin, but I have really dry skin, so facial treatments or emu oil is a good thing to remember for those really dry days. Forth, Its ok to get dirty and sweat. A good shower afterwards makes you feel clean, and helps to keep your muscles from getting too tense. Finally, as she is demonstrating right now, rest is important for muscle recovery. Get enough sleep. Personally, I don't have the time to take a nap today, but you can be sure that I will try to get to bed at a decent hour tonight.

Now, the cat on the other hand...so far all she's shown me is the importance of a good stretch and how too much sleep can make for a grumpy girl. On that note, I should probably wake her up! TTFN!

Call me consistant...

Life is crazy right now. But I have been sure to get in my three Ws work, walk, and water. Zumba toning class was yesterday and I made it through, but barely. I forgot my sneakers at home and ended up having to wear my sandals because I can't walk properly without shoes. Sandals are definately not good for zumba. They just don't have enough support and they are too bottom heavy. This resulted in my having a super sore knee today and my deciding not to go to class tomorrow. I don't want to injure myself so I'm going to stick to walking this weekend. My work schedule will only allow me to zumba once next week, but I can walk everyday.

For the past three days the pedometer has counted between 7,000 and 8,000 steps. That is still short of the 10,000 I've read you are supposed to walk each day, but I'm happy with it. Work has been gearing up and the hours are going to be crazy for the next six weeks, so any time I'm not on my butt working I try to walk. I've also switched to drinking water exclusively. I will have milk in my cereal but find myself reaching for a water bottle when I'm thirsty.

Tomorrow I am going to take the dog for a long walk before working another 6 hours. I hope she is up for it!

The line...

My feet are killing me. Sometimes I have to push myself harder, and tomorrow I have to remember to let up a bit. Not permanently, but for a day or so because my feet and legs are swollen. It's probably from the sudden increase in walking. Another lesson learned, it takes days like this to figure out where the line is and how much I can push before crossing it. Today the line was crossed. Tomorrow I hope just to touch it.

Walking, walking, walking

Most of us do not walk enough. We drive everywhere and sit down when we get there. We have food delivered and spend most of our days stationary. It's crazy to think that I have to make a conscious  decision to get up and walk. But, I do. I have to remind myself to move. I have to choose do get up off my butt and just do it! I bought a pedometer a few days ago and today finally took it out of the package. Why do I do this? Why put off the things that are easiest and jump feet first into the difficult? First it was the water bottle, then the pedometer...starting to recognize a pattern here? I'm seeing the behavior now, and hopefully by staying mindful I will be able to stop doing things like purchasing something that should help me, and then waiting to use it. I could have been recording my steps for three days already! I could be well on the way to seeing how much more effort I need to make in order to walk enough each day.

Today, with a 9 hour training, I walked 5220 steps while wearing the pedometer. I took it off when I changed out of my work clothes and forgot to put it back on, so I won't have a perfect recording. However this is a good indicator of what my days will look like for the next week if I don't supplement by walking before or after work. Luckily for me, I will be dog sitting for the next week so it will be built in. Because my days are so long, I will be taking her out in the morning and then again when I get home at night. No worries, she will be taken out mid-day as well. I'm nearly 5000 steps short of where I should be each day. My feet hurt already, I can't imagine walking more, but I know I can do it if I keep trying.

Toning sticks....more than your average maraca!

Today was my first time doing zumba toning with the toning sticks.  A little over a month ago I tried to do the class without the sticks but I wasn't far enough along in my recovery to keep up or do many of the steps. I was proud of myself for trying, but knew deep down that there was more work for me to do before I could go back and do it all out. Today I gave it my all. My leg is doing pretty well, and I feel ready to move past everything that happened this past year. I just had to wrap my brain around the idea that I really am ok now...and the things that aren't are moving in the right direction.

Now, back to the toning sticks. Toning sticks look like a hand weight (a very light hand weight) with two balls on the ends. That is not the only difference though. They have beads inside so they sound like  maracas! At first I wondered why they were so light? Half way through the class I was sure they would have to scrape me off of the floor in mere seconds. Those things got heavy fast! I wanted to stop. I wanted to shower and call it a day. But, I couldn't do that. I promised myself that I would push. I know that my body is stronger then I give it credit for. So, I pushed through it. I did all of steps, though some of them were sloppy (I would get confused and sort of flub my way though..practice makes perfect and all that jazz). I kept my sticks up over my head so much longer then I thought I could. Most of the time I was sure my upper back would explode along with my arms, butt and abs. My thighs were shaking and yet, we kept smiling. Everyone in the class was feeling beat up and we kept going. By the end we were all tired and happy that we had done it. I will definitely be doing it again, though not until Thursday because of my work schedule.

Just like so many people have told me and as I've experienced in the past, having my water bottle with me at all times helps me to remember to stay hydrated. I drank five 20 oz bottles of water today! So all in all today was a good one where I did positive things for my body. Yay me!

Cake...

So zumba didn't happen today. I did go, but when I got there nobody else showed up. It would have been me and the teacher. I'm not good enough to feel comfortable with that much one on one attention, so I made the decision to go without doing the class. I just don't feel like having someone be able to watch me closely the entire time. Part of the draw is knowing that nobody is really paying super close attention to what I am doing. Sure, the instructor will glance at you, and sometimes give you some help if you look like you are struggling, but she is not staring at you the whole time. I will go tomorrow and do the toning class instead. Not to miss my workout  I stopped at target for shampoo on the way home and ended up walking the mall to be sure to get some movement in.

I will admit I splurged today, but it was a tiny splurge. Today was my graduation party, so I celebrated my hard work with my friends. I did not over eat, but I did have  a piece of cake. However, I had already decided one piece of cake was just fine before had I even arrived, so I had a plan and stuck to it! One piece, and that piece was divine! If I'm really going to change how I approach healthy eating and exercise I know I can't make myself feel deprived. That is a guarantee that I will mess up and feel super guilty at some point. Guilt does not do anything to improve my self worth, so its better to allow treats on occasion. As long as I remember to keep them as an occasional thing, it will be fine.

I feel like I'm getting a grip on things and I'm so excited to see life continue to get better and better as time goes on. I just have to stay in the moment and breathe.

Blame it on the rain....or don't!

Today's plans to walk around the lake were squashed by the rain, but I didn't let that become an excuse not to move! Instead I ran errands and did mall laps. I walked the local mall three times and one of those was carrying cat litter! My water bottle was filled and emptied three times, and I bought a bottled water and drank that as well. I shouldn't have purchased water, but I left my bottle in the car and was thirsty while mall walking. I really need to start thinking of that bottle as a necessity, like my phone or wallet.

Tomorrow...or I guess it would be today at this point...will consist of zumba in the morning, and my graduation party in the afternoon. I'm super excited and plan to have a great time. I will still drink my water, and there will be plenty of healthy choices at the party. I don't know if I will have time to blog but I'll be sure to update on how zumba went as soon as I can. TTFN!

A journey begins with a single step...

I did it! I drank lots of water and I survived the entire zumba class!  I accomplished my goals for today! Maybe you are thinking, "Yeah, so what? Anybody can stick to something for a day." While this is true, I am going to do it again on Saturday (the zumba class that is). The water will be done again tomorrow, along with some walking around the lake.

It's hard to explain how it feels to have done an entire exercise class after being pretty immobile for such a long time. My leg, while a bit sore now, was fine during the class. For moves that required me to stand on one leg, I just held onto the bar for some stability on that side. Now, did I look good? Heck no! If there had been a moment where I could have taken my eyes off of the instructor, to actually look at myself, there would have been laughter. However, that moment rarely happened as zumba really requires that you watch to see what is going on. You can't look at the people near you and usually can't take the time to look at yourself until you really get the routines down. By that time, the instructor goes and changes them, so you are good to continue not noticing how blatantly uncoordinated you look. LOVE IT! I know I was wiggly and jiggly, but in time that will change. For now, I am just grateful to be able to move around and start to feel alive again.

Water

Water. I try to love it, I try to drink it. But the reality is some days I manage to get in as little as one glass. Granted there is water in fruit and many other foods we eat, but I find myself pretty dehydrated much of the time. 

This weekend I purchased a water bottle at an event. The hope was this would get me drinking water again. I used to carry a water bottle around and drink it all day when I was healthier. So it shouldn't be too hard to get back into the habit, right? Wrong, it has sat in anticipation on the countertop. It stared at me as I walked by forgetting to drink. Every now and again I'd look at it and think about how I should fill it up and carry it out the door with me. So far, it hasn't happened. Until today! Truth be told, I almost walked by it again. I consciously thought about what I was doing and how I was making excuses not to do something just because I was being lazy. How hard is it to fill up a water bottle?! Sometimes I'm surprised by my own ridiculousness. The ten seconds it took to fill up the bottle has not only made it possible for me to have water on hand the entire morning, its also going to save me money since there will be no need to purchase a drink should the thought cross my mind. So far half the bottle is gone. My goal is to finish it and have to refill before mid afternoon. 

This evening is zumba! It's going to kick my butt, but that's ok. Just going and moving is a step in the right direction. I can't wait to do it, and my water bottle will be right by my side. 

Doctor, Doctor give me the news....

The appointment today was interesting and I think I've learned a lot. Basically the doctor is on board with my plan to get healthy, but put some limitations on what have been deemed "The activities that should be eased into, not jumped into like a pool when your butt is on fire". While I am free to try new activities that interest me, the doctor does not want me over doing anything. Instead I am to try the activity and see how it makes me feel. If it causes pain aside from the normal post work out aches then stop. If my leg swells, stop. If my joints can't handle it and start to hurt, stop. This advice probably sounds obvious, but for anyone who knows me, I tend to be an all or nothing person, and I rarely stop unless I cannot go on. This time however, I am going to listen to my body. When something feels good, then I'll keep doing it. If it feels bad, then its time to stop. I truly believe my body knows what it needs and wants, and I just have to get out of it's way.

So then, what's the plan? Well, to be honest I don't really have one yet. I just want to make small changes that add up to a big change. Today the doctor and I set a realistic goal (she says 45-50 pounds, but did say if I could lose 55 then that would still be perfectly safe for my height) and got some healthy groceries. I also made a conscious choice to walk more by parking in the worst spot in the lot. Instead of parking close to the doctor, grocery store and work, I parked as far as I reasonably could. At work that would have put me walking more than half a mile in the dark to get my car, so I parked at the other end of the building. I still have to walk quite a ways and I can still walk inside. Much better then parking in the lot next to the front door.

As for workouts, there are many activities that sound really fun to try. I'd like to play tennis again, but the doc says to start by hitting the ball off a wall with a friend. Hiking is fun and there is a mountain near by that might be an option as I grow stronger. Of course there is swimming too, but for now I'm going to start with the exercise I loved last summer. It was fun and it worked! I lost weight and toned up when I was doing it frequently, so tomorrow I'm going back to Zumba! Once again I will have to modify it to fit my needs, but I'm going to do it anyway. I have tried a couple of zumba toning classes which go at a slower pace, but no more holding back unless I have to. I'm going to do regular zumba and then do the toning classes as well. By fitting in as many classes as I can into my schedule and budget (which is pretty non-existant at this point, but I'm going to try to make it work) I will hopefully get the boost I need to succeed.

Introducing....Me.

Hello, and welcome to my blog! My name is Heidi and I am a 31 year old recent graduate of an amazing liberal arts college for women in New England. Although I did not take a traditional route through college, I have learned from every twist and turn that life has thrown at me. Though it may not always have been this way, I am so very grateful to the people in my life who have pushed me forward (sometimes kicking and screaming).

Graduating from college has shown me that if I decide to do something, then I can do it! So, I've decided to start taking better care of myself. I am known for putting myself last, and feeling like I don't deserve any better, but that has to change. I know what I need to do, and not doing it seems silly. It could be understood if I didn't know that exercise is good for me, or that eating to the point of becoming overweight is unhealthy, but I do know. I know what is wrong with my behaviors, and I know what the implications could be. I live with them everyday.

While I do have some physical limitations, which I may or may not touch upon here, I can still do what needs to be done to be healthy. The only reason not to at this point is laziness, and that is going to stop. That is where this blog comes in. I am going to turn this around. I am going to work out, even when I don't want to and I will share my journey with others. With 55 pounds to lose before I'm safely within the healthy range for my height, I'm afraid that I won't get there. This is a thought I have to change. I will get there. It will just take time and effort on my part. Nobody else can lose the weight for me but, if they choose to, they can support me.

I will share my workout progress, healthy recipes that I try along the way (and like) and whatever else comes up on my journey to better overall health.

Ok, this is getting pretty long and I need to go to bed. Tomorrow starts off with a trip to the doctor to get my plan ok'd. Due to my particular limitations I know I need to be sure not to over do anything that I shouldn't and checking in with the doc is the best way to know that. Night!